What does this mean?
What does the world and religion say?
What does my Redeemer say?
"If you kept a record of my character flaws I could not escape being condemned? But you forgive me, so that I should stand in awe of You."
Psalm 130.3,4 revised
I suddenly realize that my concept of God has been way off. I thought God was Disappointed with me.
I thought God was like a game but I was always the loser. I thought the Game of God was a game of give and take. Then I realized I was just "playing games" with God as I was constantly trying to measure up!
Since I couldn't measure up I thought I could pay my debt by confessing to a priest or by going to church. By doing this I could start over every week after hanging out with the Slave Driver all week escaping from my shortcomings and character defects.
The Slave Driver convinced me that this was a good plan. "After all," he said, "that's what everyone else is doing.
Look how successful they are! God isn't punishing them nor is He disappointed. God just wants His part of the deal! You know...the 10%."
Wow! In this game I could fake it and drown out my depression of God's disapproval by showing up and dropping 10% in the basket. That was fine but the requirement I still needed to measure up was another issue all together. When I would go to church or be around the "Christians Leaders" I was very uncomfortable knowing I did not measure up.
After awhile as I got older my trepidation turned to sarcasm as I tried to cover the hurt of knowing I didn't measure up.
This sarcasm became bitterness and that hardened my soul. I was trying to find an escape from my Character Flaws and Shortcomings in any way I could.
Then I heard a song that came out of the Ancient Bedouin Scrolls. It was by an outcast like me that found peace. His name was Mr. Bennett. He wrote a song called, "I know that my Redeemer Lives! What comfort this sweet sentence gives..." about the life of Job and his Redeemer.
The original song writer was the Redeemer Himself and Mr. Bennett was singing about Him from Job's perspective. The words were from the Oldest Book in the Ancient Bedouin Scrolls that were found in Qumran in 1948.
As the Redeemer spoke through Job my heart began to listen. Who is this Redeemer? Who did He come to Redeem? Why was it written so long ago? What secret did Job find from this Redeemer?
Didn't Job lose everything in this "game?" How could he be so humble without bitterness? Then I realized his concept of God was a God The Redeemer. In other words my Redeemer was to come to me and bridge the gap of where I am and where I'm "supposed to be."
Then I heard about thousands of other people that also had a warped concept of God brought to them by the Slave Driver. These people were Free and full of Grace and Agape Love because they met the same Redeemer written about in the Ancient Scrolls of long ago.
This was the same Redeemer that took my place in saying, "greater love has no one than Me your Redeemer and lay down My life for you!"
I must grasp this concept! My Redeemer doesn't sound disappointed He sounds Appointed for a cause that is beyond time.
These same people I was with when I heard Mr. Bennett's song just recently were fleeing to psychedelic drugs in Berkley. They had finally found the answer to all of their shortcomings and fear of disappointing everyone including God.
I must realize that the Answer has always been the same. From the Ancient Scrolls till now the Answer is:
My Redeemer is not disappointed with me and He never has been. He knew of my Shortcomings and that is why He came to Redeem me.
Now I know this Peace that passes human understanding!
Knowing my Redeemer Lives and isn't Disappointed with me is another key to my Freedom!
Song by Mr. Bennett-I know that my Redeemer Lives
http://youtu.be/0jsOaoMp4JU
Just Go 180:
Rick
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